Chicken Nugget Commits Cannabilism


According to local reports, a Bahraini Chicken Nugget today was caught commiting cannibalism at McDonald’s near the town of Zallaq, south of Manama.

The cannibal, Bader Noaimi, allegedly ordered a “9 piece Chicken McNuggets” box and consumed it in public.

Several eyewitnesses claim to have seen him sit down at a table, open the box, and dip each chicken nugget in McDonald’s “Sweet n Sour Sauce” and viciously consume them.

Ayah Salem, who claims to have been sitting next to Bader Noaimi, said “I was sitting down with my friends to enjoy a delicious pizza from Papa Johns’ Pizza when all of a sudden he sat down and started eating the nuggets with no irony whatsoever!”

Another eyewitness, Jassim Saeed, claimed he saw Bader Noaimi coming out of McDonald’s with the chicken nuggets in his hand.

“I was a little taken aback when I saw him. He was so clearly a Chicken Nugget with his Nightmare Before Christmas shirt and that haircut,”

“You could believe my reaction when I saw him actually eat all of the chicken nuggets himself, it was disgusting.”

Ayah Salem later added, “I just couldn’t believe it. I mean you hear stories like this on the news but you never think that one of your friends is, you know, one of those cannibal people.”

We reached out to Bader Noaimi to ask about the incident but he declined to comment.



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